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Clamoring for Christ
By Jerri Phillips

We are zoo type people. We have a zoo membership, and when the weather is good, we usually pop in twice a month or more. We get the obligatory cotton candy, and we take our zoo cup, so we get “cheap” sodas, and we walk and munch while we talk about the animals, play with the rocks, and dance in the misters. Even though a zoo trip is a fairly common occurrence for us, we still delight in what we see and the wonders of wildlife. On each trip, we read the little signs that tell about the animals…again, and quite often, I answer the same questions for the umpteenth time. Still, it is a nice time for our family.

Today we went to the zoo. The Fort Worth Zoo has what I call three “legs” or sections of sidewalks. Two weeks ago when we trekked over to the zoo, we spent two hours seeing the animals on one leg of the zoo. The children became completely fascinated with the rocks by the benches, so we had a lovely time finding “rocky friendies.” Today, however, we were very active: in a mere three hours, we saw two-thirds of the zoo. One of the areas we saw included the elephants.

Now, we like elephants, and each time we visit, we read the sign that explains elephant mannerisms and communication. We also study the pictures that define an Asian elephant in contrast to an Indian elephant. Maybe one day we’ll remember the differences, but not yet. As we approached that section, I was prepared to read and study the signs again. I was ready for the onslaught of questions that would come, and I was not the least bit daunted when Anna said, “I have a question.”

“Yes?”

“Where’s Barney?”

“Bonnie (the “baby” elephant) is right there.”

“No, not Bonnie, Barney,” Anna emphasized. Barney? I don’t think there is a Barney elephant. Oh…. Barney…My brain homed in on her reference.

Barney is not an elephant. Barney is a large purple dinosaur that happened to be visiting our zoo a few months ago. He and his colleagues, B.J. and Baby Bop, were in the process of filming a movie, and part of it was being done at our zoo.

We actually saw Barney and friends very early in our trip around the zoo, but they were walking away from us. Needless to say, the crowd was rather large, so I just let them wander off without saying anything or mentioning it to Anna. When we saw them later, they were walking away again, but Anna saw them that time. “Mommy, I want to see Barney.”

“Honey, I’m not sure we can right now.” By then, he was already out of sight. We continued to walk, and as we were coming by the elephant exhibit, there were Barney and crew standing shaking some children's hands. My two little ones were in a double stroller, so Anna couldn’t run up to shake hands. Instead, she sat calmly, just happy to see Barney, B.J., and Baby Bop in person. Again, the parents were pressing in with their children either in their strollers or in their arms. While others clamored to get the dinosaurs’ attention, my children and I happily watched outside the crowd.

Anna asked if she could meet Barney. “Honey, that is pretty crowded. I really don’t want to fight a crowd. Maybe you can wave, though, if they walk by us.” Amazingly, my daughter was content with that.

After some time, the entourage began to move the movie stars out of the crowd toward their next destination. As we sat and watched these large “animals” walk by us, all three of them waved at Anna, and Baby Bop even came over and shook hands with Anna and spoke with her very briefly. Anna was happy. Not overwhelmed or star-struck, just content that Baby Bop would take time from her busy schedule to say hello to Anna.

As we stood watching parents pushing and pulling their children toward these large stuffed toys, I heard parents saying things like, “My daughter has all your videos.” “My son watches your show every day.” “We saw you at…”

And then there was Anna. Do you have any idea what Anna said when Baby Bop shook her hand? My darling daughter smiled and simply said, “Thank you, Baby Bop, for shaking my hand.”

I really need to learn to be more like Anna. Too often I find myself clamoring for Christ’s attention when I really need to learn to be content in His presence.

Don’t misunderstand. I’m not suggesting for one moment that we are to sit back and take a passive role in our spiritual lives. On the contrary, I believe we are to be proactive in seeking the Father’s face. I am not against pressing in to find deeper truth and greater revelation. However, I think it is important to realize that clamoring is not the means with which to accomplish that goal.

Jesus talked about the difference between clamoring and contented waiting. In fact, you are probably familiar with the story. Two men walk into the Temple. The first is a religious leader wearing impressive garments, conducting himself in an appropriate manner, saying all the right things. “Thank you that I have it altogether, that I don’t wallow in sin like those wicked robbers, adulterers, and the like. Unlike those evil slobs, I fast twice a week, and I tithe in accordance with the law.”

The second man is a politician, a man society tolerates as an entity forced upon them to steal from them and punish them according to his whims and moods. This man won’t even approach the holy area. In fact, he stands back toward the back. Not only that, but he won’t even look heavenward. He was so deeply grieved that he beat on his chest and said, “God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”

Jesus said the second man was justified (To get the precise story, read Luke 18:9-14). When Jesus used the word “justified,” he was actually stating that God had acquitted the man of all wrongs and declared the man righteous. Wow.

One man was declared righteous. The other man, well, he was clamoring. So what is the difference? Why was the self-confessed sinner justified while the religious man wasn’t? Well, I think it’s because clamoring does not remotely impress God.

Did you notice what the religious leader did? To be quite frank, he was pretty cocky when he strolled into the Temple to “worship” God. Then he promptly gave his résumé, including his superior religious behavior, to God. He made it a point to tell God that he most certainly was of a higher religious class than someone like, well, like that sinner publican beating on his chest and making so much racket that no one could worship correctly. After comparing himself to the sinful low-life and clearing demonstrating his superiority, the Pharisee then gave evidence of his religious fervor. He made mention of his fasting and its frequency as well as his tithe and its quantity. In other words, he was trying to impress God by his religious virtue. If you read the actual passage, the Bible states that the religious leader prayed about himself. One footnote I read said it would be more precise to say that he prayed “to” himself.

Then there’s the tax collector. He stands back because he knows there is nothing impressive about himself. He has no bragging rights. Instead of waltzing in with confidence, he falls to his knees in confession. Instead of comparing himself to others and declaring his righteousness, he compares himself to Christ and acknowledges his sinfulness. Unlike the tax collector who thought his religious record could buy him audience with God, the tax collector knew he had no means to reach God, so he waited for God to meet him. Instead of trying to obtain God through proving how worthy he was, he obtained worth by allowing God to come to him as he was.

Too often, people clamor for God’s attention. I confess that sometimes I am one of those people. You can call it being self-righteous, judgmental, critical, or just flat asinine. I can analyze the cause until Freud is resurrected and admits his mistakes, and it won’t change the fact that comparing myself to others in order to establish my righteousness is nothing more than clamoring, and God is not impressed.

Now, if you are like me, it is really easy to think, “I don’t steal. I don’ t commit adultery. I don’t do drugs or blow our rent at the gambling casino.” If you don’t do those things, great. I really don’t either, but you know, I still have problems with selfishness. I still catch myself saying things to manipulate people. I still struggle with anger, and I have to repent for using my mouth in a destructive way on a regular basis. In light of all I still do wrong, not stealing really doesn’t help my cause much.

Besides, do you realize what we are really declaring when we give God our spiritual résumé, highlighting our triumphs? What we are stating is, “Lord, I’m doing well enough that I don’t think I really need you. I mean, like, I need you to bless me, but all in all, I’m a pretty good person, and uh, well, I just thought I’d let you know that I don’t really need to ask forgiveness. Instead, I’ll just tell you how good I am, and you’ll see that I am right.”

You may be thinking that I am wrong, but if you really meditate about it, you’ll realize that sadly I’m on target. When we delineate the reasons we are so good compared to those sinful slobs around us, we never confess our need for the Lord, do we? After all, why do we need Him when we are doing things right? We don’t need His help. We certainly don’t need His forgiveness. We are just fine on our own, and to God, our rattling off our “pat me on the back because I’m so impressive list” is nothing more than clamoring, nothing more than useless noise.

In contrast, though, when we realize that we have nothing to earn or barter our way into His presence and acknowledge that we need Him to come to us, the Father is moved. In fact, because He knew we would never be able to reach Him, He reached out to us by sending His only Son (John 3:16) to reconcile us to Himself (2 Corinthians 5:18).

Unfortunately, in our pursuit of happiness and wholeness, we often bind ourselves to misery and insecurity by clamoring for God’s favor. In vying for God’s attention we create a divisive competition in which our righteousness is based on others’ unrighteousness more than on Christ’s holiness. We rationalize and dismiss our own unrighteousness by pointing to someone else of greater degradation than us. Almost anyone is righteous compared to Hitler or Charles Manson. Big deal

It is not our superior behavior in comparison to others that makes us righteous. Rather, it is our imperfections in comparison to Christ that makes it obvious that we are sinners in need of a Savior. It is when we realize that God always meets our needs, not because we deserve it, but despite our lack of deserving it, that we are able to stop clamoring and wait in His presence for Him to come to us, and He will because that is Who He is. More amazingly, He actually desires to approach us and have a relationship with us, but He cannot do that as long as we try to bribe Him with our performance. It is not until we recognize how much we need Him that we will ever be able to have a fulfilling relationship with Him. We will never understand our worth until we understand how unworthy we are. We will never comprehend the depth of His love for us until we can grasp that we truly are unlovable.

It is only when we realize that God offers forgives when there is no reason to forgive and love when He really has reason to be appalled at us that we understand the desire God has for us and the joy He finds in a relationship with us. It is only when we realize that we have nothing to offer that we will overwhelmed by the true love that caused Him to give the gift of His Son. Only then we will truly find God and the wholeness we really desire. That is when we realize our true worth.

So stop clamoring. You can’t buy anything with God because you’re not good enough, but don’t worry. God knows that. That's why He picked up the bill, and to Him, you're worth it.